In the past year or so i’ve worked out something that has had a pretty big impact on the way I think and feel.
I’m in the middle of this self exploration, to the point where i’ve finally become mature enough, or intune with myself enough that I can understand why I feel like I do about certain situations, and once I pin it down it doesn’t matter as much
What i’m trying to say is that in the past year i’ve worked out just to accept my moods, more than ever before. They just are, even if they don’t make sense. If i’m sad i’m sad, happy happy. It doesn’t matter why really. This has helped me get over things a great deal more. I always used to have this incredible guilt at being sad for no reason, and confusion at being happy for no reason. In the end this just made me feel worse. So i’ve decided to accept this part of me, for good or bad. With this acceptance that not everything has to have a reason I have also been better able to get over things, instead of hating myself for being sad and therefor making myself feel worse I take it as I come: rant, cry, read or scream. But it helps me move on.
This ability to move on, has also been affected by my developing sense of self and what I find important. I’ve suddenly reached that age where I can pinpoint why I don’t like someone, not just that feeling with no reason. Because I understand why I can move past it, stop dwelling on it and accept I don’t like everyone, not everyone likes me. If you ask me why I don’t like you I can actually answer you and it has stopped me feeling like a horrible person because of that
